we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
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