...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
