I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
Slut skills are useful in every country.
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
I'm confused about why you felt the need to ask me to buy you life alert for christmas at 3:28 this morning.
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
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