Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize
