Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
Randomize
