At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Randomize
