No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
Randomize
