Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
Randomize