can you come get me and bring me shorts and a shirt
maybe shoes and water too
oh and maybe a noose to hang myself
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
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