We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
Randomize
