By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize
