in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
Went to an open-bar law school party and puked in front of Justice Scalia. My legal career is now complete -- I literally got judged by a U.S. Supreme Court Justice. Can't get any higher than that.
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
Randomize