Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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