the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
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