What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
Randomize
