I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
never play flip cup with pint glasses
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
FYI you are now my emergency contact at plan parenthood
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
Randomize
