did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
During breaking dawn, he leaned over and asked me why she would have to worry about her period since she essentially just married a walking super-absorbant tampon... It was the best way to ruin those movies for me.
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Randomize
