Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
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