I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Randomize
