her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
Randomize
