so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
I sent the random girl I had sex with last night a 'happy mothers day' text as a reminder to get the morning after pill.
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
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