now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
Randomize
