Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
Is it wrong that I have to schedule a family Sunday brunch around my mom's weekly banging of my stepdad. And why do I even know this??
Randomize
