wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
Randomize