I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
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