It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
This is the worst date ever. Pls kill me. No, wait, scratch that, stick to the original plan of killing Paris Hilton, I'll live though this
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
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