Ambien. No doubt about it.
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
I want you to know I am at work super hungover and I threw up in the mop sink. I feel like you will appreciate this
You're my fucking hero
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
Randomize
