You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
Randomize
