Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
We had to coat check the pizza.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
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