dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
Randomize