normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Randomize
