she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
I drunkenly recorded an episode of Family Matters last night. I took a shot everytime Carl Winslow had a mustache.
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
