I'm chasing vodka with french fries.
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
Randomize
