I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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