wakey wakey hands off snakey
she pooped in my shower. pooped. woke me up and said she thought she farted but it wasnt a fart i went back 2 sleep and found it hours later. no longer hooking up w chicks my moms age.
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
Randomize
