she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
Randomize
