Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
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