my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
So it turns out there are pros and cons to having a broken wrist. Pro: I can give amazing blowjobs with my left hand. Con: I just had to open a packet of crisps with scissors.
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
I want to play lord of the rings tonight. And by that I mean get really drunk, potentially lost, and go trekking through the woods or climbing shit. I want all of you there. You are the fellowship. This is a mass text. I am insanely high.
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
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