She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
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