You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
We're using joints as your birthday candles
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
This toilet bowl is my home.
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
Randomize
