I made out with a fat chick last night in a hot tub... btw I am breaking up with you
My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
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