so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
Is it weird that I only look up my ex on Twitter when I take a shit? May have conditioned myself to associate him with shit
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
Randomize
