I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
Randomize