she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
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