There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
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