can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
Bubblewrap condoms. We can steal Ziplock's new slogan. Protection you can hear.
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
Randomize
