Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
Hey had an urgent voicemail from the Illinois national guard....have you been using my identity for your blackout weekend?
Yes and yes
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
Randomize
