Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
