Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
Randomize