the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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