I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
if i died would you start the facebook group?
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
Here's a tip: do NOT chant "MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS." during sex because the Packers won against the Giants.
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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